January 21, 2009

Snap shots of things

So in keeping busy, I have been doing pretty cool things.
The weekend went by in snapshots.
I was getting over being sick so it sort of felt like a haze of events.


Hung out with Jazzy and Mads and went to the Scion art exhibit showing art from Berlin.
To be honest, I was there for the socializing more than the art.
But free drinks, pretty people, gussying up and hanging out with friends seemed like as good a reason as any.
The art was weird.
Jazzy: "This art makes me never want to go to Berlin"
I was feeling the exact same way.


Later that evening, Jazzy and I drove around looking for Hollywood parking to attend a friend of Jazzy's birthday at the Cat and the Fiddle.
40 minutes later, we found a spot.
We drank some drink.
We talked some talk.
And we got caught up on boys and stuff.
We also accidentally walked into the men's room.
Jazzy realized it right away.
I, however, wondered what the low sink was for.
I still was wondering when Jazzy pulled us out of there.
I guarantee you I would have gotten it had there been a man peeing in there.
But there wasn't.
We weren't the only ones who did that.
I watched others make the same mistake. A big "W" and a big "M" should be enough of an indicator.
Who knows?


Met the ladies downtown at Cole's French Dip last week.
Food was yummy. Place was great.
The people who wandered in were cute and interesting. At least they looked interesting.
Mads noticed when a cute one smiled at me.
I noticed too.
I smiled back.
But it was too late.
I suck at flirting.
I had a dream that Brett from Flight of the Conchords was flirting with me and I just geeked out and went spazzy. I woke up wondering how I can't even flirt in my dreams.
After Cole's, we headed over to the bar the Association which is right next door to Cole's. It was nice, dark and red in there.
And I got celebrity parking right in front of both places.


Went with my friend Kevin to my meditation group. I was happy to bring him. I think he enjoyed it and my group loved him.
My mentor (the lady that runs the group) is very fun, loving and cheerful. She is a bit loopy too.
I was telling Kevin this after the meditation when we were on our way home.
I told him that after I had been to the first meditation group at her home and after we had emailed for a few weeks, I saw her at another function. She was smiling at me.
And then she asked me my name. I was like, "Char, It's me, Kirsten. We have been emailing"
She was rightfully embarrassed and was like, "Oh my gosh, I can't believe I didn't recognize you. You have been on my mind a lot this week. This is really strange."
So I told Kevin this story.
"Maybe it was because I was wearing pigtails that day," I said to Kevin.
"Well, in her defense...you do look different when you wear your hair in pigtails. Almost like a character from a play."


Leigh's baby was in day care and her husband was on a business trip so she had the unusual opportunity of being alone. She was wondering what to do and thought it would be fun to go see "Happy Go Lucky" with me.
I hung up the phone, jumped in my car and joined her in Culver City.
The movie was a little weird for me. Not sure what the point of it was exactly. But I did enjoy the performances.
We had a great lunch and then picked up Leigh's daughter from day care. That kid is so funny and the best part was when she tilted her head back and squinted her eyes and fake laughed at me...several times.
That will come in handy in life little girl. Trust me.


So Indie 103.1 is off the air. Apparently, they were all fired on Thursday before a prompt came on saying they wouldn't play the corporate game. Who to believe in this world of lies and bad radio?
Sadness. But they sponsored a free show at the Echoplex in Echo Park last night and my neighbor Lisa and I dressed up, drove down Sunset, parked in front (more celebrity parking) of the Echo (which wasn't as close to the Echoplex as we thought) where they were having an Inauguration Party.
We heard a few bands. I am in love with Castledoor who revved us up after the sleepy sounds of the first band.
We chatted, drank, talked to a few people and then during Earl Greyhounds, we headed back home with the music of trailing behind us.
I hope Indie comes back. It was a good show. They were a good station.


Click goes the snap shots. Click click click.

Posted by Kirsten at 11:17 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

january is the color of blue

I hate January. It's a bluesy month.
I like singing the blues.
But I hate feeling them.
I never realized it before but the pattern as it stands is that I am usually getting over someone, getting over the holidays, trying to create a new existence and it all feels futile.
February always brings me some hope since it's my bday month.
And this year I will be 40. 40! Ack!
But right now we are in January.
And I do what I always do...I keep busy to stave off the blues.
Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn't.
But every January gets a little better than the previous one.
And there is a new president.
And I am in therapy.
And the diet is kind of easy.
So there are things.
That are working.
I can't wait for the January where I am no longer aching for something.
I can't wait for the January where I am as happy as I am say in August.
But until that January happens, I will do what I do...I keep busy to stave off the blues.
And if the blues come, then I will just have to sing.

Posted by Kirsten at 09:27 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 13, 2009

Over It

You know how it is when you romanticize things?
And then you get hit with the truth.
And a former you would have cried at how mean someone can be who claimed to think you deserved nothing but tenderness but now has such hatred in their words towards you.
Yes the former you would have cried
But now..but the present you shakes her head and thinks "thank god I learned this about you before I walked away thinking you were someone to moon over."
You know how that is?
Now I do too.

Posted by Kirsten at 03:39 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 11, 2009

Other Ways to Travel For Art

My neighbor Lisa has a car. But she loves to take the bus and the subway everywhere since she hates dealing with traffic and parking.
In many of the cities I have traveled to or lived in, I did not drive. I walked, rode bikes, took the subways, lightrail, train and the bus.
But in LA, I have only taken the subway.

My neighbor Lisa had told me about Glen E. Friedman's photo exhibit at Shepard Fairey's Studio One in Echo Park. It ran from December until this weekend.

She went on opening night but I hadn't had a chance.
So knowing this was my last chance to see it, she suggested we go Saturday afternoon, take the bus there, have a drink at El Compadre and then bus it back home.

The weather here in LA is super clear and warm. You can blame the Santa Ana winds on the conditions but there was nary a breeze on this particular day.

We decided to walk for a bit since the day was so gorgeous.
When the bus finally arrived, it was packed with people.
My FIRST public bus experience in LA. Could that really be? I grew up here. But it really is a city inhabited by cars and their owners.

We arrived at Studio One and were the only ones in there...except for the people who worked there.
I was marveling at the photos. So many shots of iconic people before they were famous. Glen photographed the Dog Town skaters in their heyday. His shots were so inspiring.
I couldn't believe how this guy at such a young age had tapped into capturing so many cool people, events, moments...
And then I turned around and realized that Glen, the photographer, was seated in the middle of the gallery signing books.
He was telling stories behind some of the shots to a verbose guy.
The guy behind the counter told us that if we had any questions, here was a unique opportunity to ask the artist himself.
He looked Tim Burton-esque.
Still very young-esque.
I couldn't think of anything to ask him or say to him.
His pictures said it all.
They made me feel electric.

Lisa and I headed out after eavesdropping a bit.
We got our drink on at El Compadre. It takes very little for us to be loopy.

We left there to get the next bus home.

But being a bit tipsy and enjoying the sun, we hoofed it a bit.
We went into the new bookstore on Sunset. And the time travel shop.
It was all very clever and fun.
It might have felt very precocious if I hadn't been drinking but I had so my cynicism was put on hold.

We walked down to Echo Park lake and meandered among the families, picnicking ladies and the homeless. Downtown LA shined so clearly in front of us.

We walked back up to Sunset and waited at the next bus stop.

Arriving back at home, I had big plans to go out and take pictures.
Or go to the Mountain Bar for a party.
Or go to my friend Kate's.

But none of those things happened.

I opted for a nap instead.

Being inspired can take a lot out of you.
But in a good way.

Posted by Kirsten at 04:23 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 06, 2009

The Weekend That Got Me Back On Track

And although I had a very nice time with him, I didn't feel a spark. My friends were telling me that it's because I am soooo used to bad boys and complicated men.
So after the date, realizing that I have become cliche when I wasn't looking, I got angry.
I went for a walk down the block and passed all kinds of people enjoying the brisk LA evening, laughing and imbibing.
I was pissed.
I ducked into a bookstore.
I was so pissed that I even got angry looking at art.
What the F was wrong with me?
Was I mad at myself? At the guys? At what I have been through? At people having fun?
Who knew?
And just as quickly as the anger came on, it dissipated.
My neighbor Lisa seeing me in my "Le Suck" (her newly used phrase) state, invited me to an art show at Wacko.
We walked there and just by moving my legs and sharing good company, I got rid of some of the residual emotional bile that had been accumulating.
It also made me realize that I can't just go for a guy because he is nice and is the opposite of what floats my boat if there is no chemistry. I realized there were some red flags that I couldn't overlook from the guy. He may have been nice. But he wasn't a match. This I know. And it made me feel less cliche, and therefore, a little happier. Even if the date wasn't heavily romantic or exciting, you should at least remember that you went on a date when you wake up the next morning. And I didn't.

The next night, I went with Zappy and JW to dinner in Silverlake.
I didn't know how much I was missing my nights out with friends.
We put our name in and then wandered over to the wine shop where they had tastings while we waited for our table.

Not noticing how long the wait was since we were gabbing and drinking fabulous vino, we finally got the call.

Once seated and ready to order, we were chatting about John Travolta's son and how the Scientologists are going to cover this up. The waitress overheard us and started talking with us also. We were kind of loud talking about how crazy they are with their aliens and Tom Cruise.
I spotted a cute man behind JW who was sitting by himself.
I kept looking at him. Once in awhile he would look at me.
This went on for awhile.
About an hour into dinner, Zappy leans over to me and says, "Is that Giovanni Ribisi?"
"No," I say, "that is the cute guy I have been checking out all night long. I don't think Giovanni is that cute."
"Oh" she concedes.
JW turns around (not stealthy) and takes a look.
"That is totally him. I have met him and that is him" she squeaks.
"No, that is the guy I have been making eyes at" I repeat.
"That is how you make eyes at someone? You are very subtle. To the point of almost NOT even doing anything" Zappy says cracking herself up.
I look again.
It IS Giovanni.
And then I realize that since he is a scientologizt, he may have overheard our conversation about Travolta.
And here I thought there would be a Craigslist missed connection.
Silly me.

JW, Zappy and I shared dating horror stories and it was the BEST thing I could have done.
It made me feel less alone, less dumb, less pathetic. We have ALL made bad choices with the LA men and what we have put up with. It became hilarious.

Zappy is now dating a nice guy.
So is JW. She is dating a brain surgeon. She used to date an unemployed writer who told her she couldn't call him during the day because it would "interrupt his flow".
"The Brain Surgeon doesn't mind that I call him during the day. AND HE IS OPERATING ON BRAINS!"

Sunday, I spent with Leigh, AJ and their baby at Griffith Park. We went to the pony rides and the carousel and Travel Town. I got some amazing pictures. While at the Pony Rides, there was a creepy man who struck up a conversation with me thinking that Leigh's baby was mine. He reminded me of a future version of some of the a-holes I have dated. It made me shiver.
AJ said, "Aw, you made a friend". I rolled my eyes.
That guy was creepy talking about how his kid had changed his life even though he was a boo boo. His kid is 2 years old, the man is 55 and he was going on and on about how he would have normally been there to check out women but now he was there for his son. But when the pony ride ended, his son was still the only one on the pony because all the other parents had picked up their kids but this yahoo was still talking to me.

Sunday night. I joined Mads, Zappy and JW at an italian restaurant in Burbank. The lengths we would go for good pizza since Cafe Bianca in Eagle Rock was closed.
It was more of the same jibber jabber from the night before that had me laughing and feeling the warmth of the sisterhood of bad dating stories.

I fell to sleep Sunday night feeling like all the residue that I was feeling from December might suddenly be gone. Or at least diminished.

What a good way to start the week.

Posted by Kirsten at 10:26 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

January 02, 2009

2009 Will Be More Than Fine

Maybe it is because of the end of the year, or maybe a sense of sitting in my pjs and being online, but I found myself looking over past blogs of mine in between cyber stalking people I don't know but who know people I know.

NYE 2004 was the cusp of thing changing for me.
And in reading the blogs from that time, I realize how much happier I am today than I was then.
That was a surprise since I have been feeling blue lately. And when you feel blue, you start to think you have always felt this way and that nothing works.
But in reading what my mind set was back then, I am truly grateful that I am not there anymore.
And that made me less blue.

Mr. Blondie and I tried to make it work again. But there really is no solution when you have two people whose goals are in direct opposition to the other's.

The middle ground feels like settling which is not how you want to begin a new year.

I have also been watching some depressing but interesting music documentaries: The Devil and Daniel Johnston, You're Gonna Miss Me and Be Here to Love Me. So to counter the effects, I am also watching Mamma Mia.

I now believe that cheesy doesn't counteract depressing. But the idea that I thought it would makes me kind of giggle.

New Year's Eve, Reb invited a few of us over to her and Toby's pad in Hollywood. The goal was to start the fun there and then wander down to Hollywood and bar hop. But we danced and drank and laughed and talked and realized that we didn't want to leave. At 11:55 we went to the roof and watched Hollywood shine at midnight. The apartment manager Daryl, came up and told us to be quiet. he said some people have to work the next day. He ignored our offer to party with us. Well, didn't ignore as much as rejected us. "I don't need to party with y'all" he said waving us away with a flashlight lighting his feet.

That Daryl. What a card.

Yesterday, Zappy made some WONDERFUL food and had a small dinner party. It was delicious and it was also warmly familiar. She made some chicken quesadilla (sp?) that I think is my new favorite food ever. I am still licking my chops thinking about it.

So I bid 2008 adieu. I learned a lot. I learned that I the ability to feel deeper feelings in relationships than I had in a long time. I learned how mature I have become and how far I still need to go. I learned who my true friends were and also how friendship takes on different manifestations. No one is all bad or all good and no word is ever final when you are willing to let certain people in your life. Everyone can change. And that was nice to draw certain lines and let certain lines become wobbly. I learned that even though my therapist isn't someone I would want to go to lunch with, she is getting me to a place I have never gone before in learning about myself. It's not fun. And it's not easy. But it's necessary.

So I begin 2009 with a better leg up than past years.
I welcome it with all the challenges, rewards, friendships, love, health, lessons and opportunities it will offer.

Happy New Year everyone. Let's ride this thing with some wisdom and some abandon and compare notes some time.

Bye 2008...your work is done.

Posted by Kirsten at 10:39 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack